Life is Simple isn't it?

Sept. 22nd/2009 With time, the allegiance for undivided truth will digest your measured attempts to never undo the regrets you have placed into a dark dusty storage space. Rather, you will ask yourself if these secrets are meant to develop everything that you desire as if to each be mini inner-brain social machines, producing good systematic deletion of unwanted memory. Replace your bad times by inventing, procreating and successfully staring down the good in everything. Sometimes we all find it tough to idealize free-spirited thinking. Production of sidetracking mechanisms is starving the honesty within everyday social implications. Thus, we must cuss at us and thrust for our need for returned trust. Trust is a song with many different riffs. The compounded integrity of ones' definition of life differs from one to the next. Despite our humbled disregard for inequality amongst animals, genders, races and religions, we all seek redemption and happiness by the completion of simple tasks. Wake up in the morning. Oooh, take a hot shower. Brush your teeth under the spray so you can really give er'. Put on that cologne that your ex ex ex ex girlfriend gave you three years ago that still hasn't keeled. Put on your favorite socks that never ride down from there fully vertical, taught and stretched normal state, hours into the day. Walk the pooches liberally and head off to work for a day. Life is simple isn't it?

Humans With Special Needs Saved my Life

Wednesday, September 16, 2009 Humans with Special Needs Saved my Life. The town i grew up in is a landmark for positive guidance and direction, related to people with special needs. Within my town is a large association with day programs, group homes and a puzzle of people connected together to make a small chunk of the world, with people who are often shun from much of the world, a little less ignorant and easier to live in. When I was sixteen I was banged up in a car accident very badly. I was off my feet for over two years, had session upon session of physio therapy, and, a large chunk of my teenage memories remains unvisited. At this point in my life, decisions were demanding in the immediate future. College....my band.... my girlfriend. Basically all of the teenage shit was present. Fucking puberty for Christ sakes. I was trying to become a man and injury stopped me dead in my tracks. Finally.......... I can wipe my own ass!... I was out the door and gone. I continued partying and working as a cook while I repeatedly dropped out of school to make the current and rotating band situation a little stronger. Cooking was my easily achieved fall-back employment. Every time a band fell apart, I found a new job burning my forearms and slicing the ends of my fingers off in a jiffy. My seemingly never-ending choice for employment and my train wreck of post traumatic, physical and mental amnesia were soon to collide. It's a funny thing, inquiring brain damage and fourteen broken bones while at the same time spending two weeks in a coma, and having no memory to show for it. It used to feel like the car crash never happened. It just happened to be that I was walking on crutches forever as a result of something that seemingly never of happened. Pretty soon the long days on my feet at work and my unremembered physical trauma would complement each other in a very painful way. The days got longer and the bones got more sore. Every minute of every hour of every day of every year was slowly grinding me down to nothing but pain and depression. I had nothing else to live on other than long painful nights in a sweaty cooking box slicing my shit all to hell. The aching finally soothed in September 2008. I hadn't been cooking for a couple months at this point. The pain made me get out of the job that ironically saved me. The profession that carried me through all my injuries was now creating injuries upon injuries. What was there to do? How could I survive? I knew nothing about anything other then cooking and the couple years of high school that I remembered. The choices were demanding in the immediate future. One day, the sunbeams bailed down like compressed creation. I winced for a tasty beverage. Out of booze. Oh no! Off to the liquor store because I am an umemployed, depressed bag of pain with nothing else to do but get bombed. Better bring a resume. I heard they give benefits! Benefits is what this old man needs. Pay for more physio! I stood in line with a bottle of scotch, a scruffy beard and high hopes of secure employment. My voice skipped as I was brushed from behind. A cute little lady shined with overpowering kindness and spoke these words. The words that changed my life. "You should apply for the association, we could always use some men to work with the guys!" Done 13 months later. The year has went by slowly in a quick way. I seize every moment with the amazing people that surround me, which makes the past year seem slow. I love it so much that I wish it had lasted longer. I wish the days were longer so I would see greatness for more sun in a day. Such a powerful community I am a part of. What a good sense of human morality, fair judgment and mutual respect. It's truly amazing what people who are sometimes not given fair credit and appreciation have to offer to life. Bliss are those who compare themselves not to any other but themselves. My feet are on the ground and they are no longer sore. WiLkshAkE

Sumerian/Freemason Conspiracy Philosophy

Thursday, March 06, 2008 Sumerian/Freemason Conspiracy Philosophy Somewhere between 5000 and 6500 years ago there lived an advanced version of the human race we know today. The Sumerians, native to Sumer were much like us. This astrophysical society was erased from modern society at every era of recorded history ever since until the last couple of decades. These Sumerian truths and astonishing artifacts have now resurfaced thousands of years later marking them the oldest archaeological findings of civilized history. The Sumerians existed before the Mayan's and before the Inca's and are causing me a bit of "Fucked in the headness". Sumerian artifacts: As previously stated the Sumerians were native to their land Sumer. Sumer in its own modern time was located on the land that we now know as Iraq. Archaeologists discovered tablets of Sumer decades ago in Iraq and only recently progressed to a publicly valid level of language decoding. The writings of the Sumerian cultures outline and template the book of Genesis in the holy bible. In fact, with research, you will find that the tablets of Sumer template most religions, to a certain degree, known to man today. Thus, indicating a superior way of life that got diluted by the all-warring human, through centuries of segregation and rivalry that vanished the truths completely. The search for the divine way of life that reveals the secrets of Grandmother Universe has been lost in the past. Displayed on the Sumer Tablets: There was a being much like a king on the etched tablets up to twice the height of the civilian being granted a hoe for farm use. The larger being gave the civilians the tools and knowledge for agriculture it seems. However, on the very same tablet, there lies the question and capsizing astonishment. Behind this portrayed super being, handing over the farm tool, is a sun surrounded with planets. Now, the funny thing is that not only is this tablet thousands of years old, before Einstein and modern Astronomy, but the solar system hieroglyphic displays exact proportional planets known to our solar system today. All nine of our inner solar planets are in there correct position around the sun, named accordingly and proportionate to each other as we know them today. In decoded scriptures of the Sumerian tablets it is also described that Uranus and Neptune are twin bluish green planets. In modern astronomy it has been proved from a very short distance that this is true. Wait. There is more. On the same tablet, in the same hieroglyphic, in the same accurate depiction of our modern day solar system there is a tenth planet. The planet is about eight times the size of the earth in the hieroglyphic and resides far off the borders of Pluto. The planet was named by the Sumerians, Nibiru which translates to "Bringer of life". The proportional exactness of the other planets on the tablet has propelled, only recently, modern day astronomers to deeply research this outer solar plant. In 1983, the news of this outer solar brown dwarf star planet made the headlines. "Images of a higher power" is what the article was titled and boldly stated the science of the planet that had been proved to exist by astronomers and physicists. In articles shortly after this one, it was boldly stated that the information was simply incorrect and the story almost forcefully disappeared from the news. The science and research of Nibiru has determined concretely that the planet is an old sun, or brown dwarf about 8 times the size of earth and is in orbit around our sun. By vector physics and high powered galactic telescopes it has been proven that this brown dwarf star name Nibiru by the Sumerian culture has a 3600 year orbit around our sun compared to one year for earth. The orbit is gargantuan and has been determined through decades of research to have an oval orbit as opposed to the circular orbit of the planets we have in our known inner solar system. The research is so detailed and advanced that it has also captured thermal photographs of Nibiru and its three satellites or moons. Nibiru is an old star that produces much less heat than an active star. It smolders upon itself in its magma state and gives of a strong red color much like mars. An oval orbit would mean that in half of Nibiru's orbit, it and its moons move closer to the sun and in the other half its orbit it and its moons move away rather then remaining constant. This proves a legend of the Sumerian people of a Red Monster. The Sumerian Red Monster is described in ancient Sumerian writings as a Red, Fired Circle in space much like a red moon on fire that only visits every 3600 years to destroy the Earth. The symmetry with modern science is uncanny. Every 3600 this Red Monster visits and every 3600 years, Nibiru is at it closest point to the sun, thereby its closest point to the Earth. The tale from the Sumerians goes further into the Red Monsters 3600 year approach to our sun. The Sumerians also inscribed the Red Monsters next return. Dec. 21. 2012 is the exact date inscribed on the tablet. Doesn't that almost seem like a warning? As previously stated it has been proven that the Brown Dwarf star named Nibiru has an oval, 3600 year orbit around our sun and gravitationally allocates three moons. Through vector physics and scientific/mathematical research it has been determined that Nibiru will be visible to the naked human eye in 2011. Further research was done in regards to its orbital positioning as it passes through our solar system in 2012 along with the, "Flight patterns" if you will, of its three moons. Here is the scary part: Nibiru will pass through the empty space between Saturn and Jupiter on December 21st 2012 making it visible to the naked human eye. Hmm, that is the date that the Sumerians depicted the next visit from the circular red monster in the sky that ends existence. Coincidence? Think probability when asking yourself, coincidence? Here is the real scary part: Science has proven that one of the brown dwarfs' moons is on a collision course with earth for December 21st 2012. An armageddon has been scientifically scheduled for earth as it has been in genesis, hundreds of other religions and of course the new found words of the Sumerian era. Let me remind you that at the speed Nibiru is traveling, a pebble 2 millimeters thick would cut straight through both sides of an armored spacecraft. Let me also remind you that the moon of Nibiru scheduled for an unavoidable impact with our planet Earth is trillions times the size of that pebble and moving at the same speed. The result will be a complete annihilation of all life on the surface of the earth that we know and love today. All plants, all animals and people incinerated and all water evaporated shortly after impact. The months before the impact and potential destruction of the earth will be filled with static charge or lightning storms, and natural disasters of every kind in abundance. The solar radiation interference of the brother and sister stars, the sun and Nibiru, will cause volatile inconsistencies in the earth's comfortable state. Dramatic increase of climate warmth and and simultaneous natural disasters will overtake the earth before impact. I WONDER IF GLOBAL WARMING IS DUE TO THE NEARING PROXIMITY OF A SECOND STAR IN OUR GALAXY? Why is this being kept so hush hush? Why the fuck is this not being massively exposed to every person on this earth? The potential destruction of all things living is event horizon and nobody knows about it except for hmmm... lets see.... all goverments, every space science institute, and especially Nasa. What else has Nasa covered up? Why was there only one manned mission to the moon? Why was there no drilling or test samples in the media. Why was the entire moon not publicly discovered, filmed and researched? With all of the validated information that I have exposed to you I am driven to believe that a higher power like the government is covering the truth up. However I am also reminded of an ancient brotherhood that is eminent in all of the worlds governments. I am reminded of an ancient brotherhood that is known to hold ancient secrets of our past. I am reminded of an ancient brotherhood in which rank or degree is based and achieved on holding the truth of the ancient knowledge the group lives by for the longest. I am reminded of the Freemasons. The Freemasons: The Freemasons are the oldest, most historically and modernly present brotherhood known to mankind. The highest degree members of the brotherhood are said to hold ancient legacies and prophecies from as far back in time as 2000 years before christ. The Freemasons, as said before, are eminent in historical and modern times alike. From politics to entertainment, each Freemason lives a successful life with guidance and support unified from every Freemason on the face of the Earth. There are thousands of Freemasons who are open towards there membership of the ancient brotherhood and are socially recognized typically as "The good people of society". The modo of the Freemason Brotherhood is as follows: "Take a good man, and make him even better. " Freemasons publicly display the will to better society and help humanity but many underlying rumors disrupt the validity of the ancient gang. It is rumored that the Freemason 33rd and 34th degree members, which is the highest of ranks, have the select knowledge of the mysteries of the universe. The brotherhood frequently gather local members for what they call lodge meetings to discuss and perform rituals of very distant descent. The Freemason admission system is a seemingly easy process as to that they have admission sites all over the internet. However, the truth is that you have to be referred by an existing member to qualify for the next step of possible admission. The next step is a fee and a lengthy written Q and A session. Once done answering all applicable questions you are sent home and told to await to be approved or disapproved. If you are approved, you are titled to 1st Degree Freemason and sworn into silence of Freemason activity to non-Freemasons with a sacred oath of over 3000 known years. That is why it is such a mysterious group of select people. From there you gradually advance to second degree Freemason by successful completion of propped skits, mirroring ancient rituals and appointed quests among society, bettering your life. Noted Freemasons: George Washington, James Monroe, Andrew Jackson, James Polk, James Buchanan, Andrew Johnson, James Garfield, William McKinley, Theodore Roosevelt, William Howard Taft, Warren G. Harding, Franklin D. Roosevelt, Harry S. Truman, Lyndon B. Johnson, Gerald R. Ford. That is fifteen Freemason American presidents. Winston Churchill, Simon Bolivar, Edmund Burke, Benito Juarez, Edward VII, Geroge VI, Bernardo O'Higgins, José de San Martin, Francisco de Paula Santander, José Rizal, José Marti, Pandit Nehru, Lajos Kossuth, Jonas Furrer, Guiseppe Mazzini, Eduard Benes, John A. MacDonald, Aaron Burr, George McGovern, Barry Goldwater, Estes Kefauer, Thomas E. Dewey, Alf Landon, Hubert H. Humphrey, Wendel Wilke, W.E.B. DuBois, William Jennings Bryant, King Hussein of Jordan, Yasser Arafat, Francois Mitterand, Helmut Kohl, Gerhard Shroeder, Tony Blair, Yikzak Rabbin, Cecil Rhodes, Sir John J.C. Abbott, Stephen F. Austin, John G. Diefenbaker, Samuel J. Ervin Jr. (Watergate committee), Benjamin Franklin, John Hancock, Patrick Henry, Rev. Jesse Jackson, Sam Nunn, Lowell Thomas (brough Lawrence of Arabia to pub. not.), Gov. George C. Wallace, Strom Thurman, Jesse Helms, Robert Dole, Jack Kemp, Al Gore, Prince Phillip (GB), Zbigniew Brzezinski, Lord Peter Carrington, Andrew Carnegie, W. Averell Harriman, Henry Kissinger, Richard D. Heideman, Robert McNamara. They are all Freemason political leaders world wide. Omar Bradley, John J. Pershing, Douglas McArthur, General Winfield Scott, Captain Eddie Rickenbacker, Jimmy Doolittle, General Mark Clarkem General George C. Marshall, General Henry "Hap" Arnold, John Paul Jones, Afred von Tirpitz (submarine warfare). They are all Freemason Military leaders worldwide. W.A. Mozart, Leopold Mozart, Ludwig van Beethoven, Jean Sibelius, Franz Liszt, Josef Haydn, Irving Berlin, Gutzon Borglum, Charles Peale, Alfons M. Mucha, Richard Wagner, John Philip Sousa, Gilbert & Sullivan, George Gershwin, George M. Cohen, Count Basie, Louise Armstrong, Nat King Cole, Giacomo Meyerbeer, Sigmund Romberg, John Wayne, Red Skelton, Clarke Gable, W.C. Fields, Will Rogers, Burl Ives, Roy Rogers, Danny Thomas, Ernest Borgnine, Oliver Hardy, Tom Mix, Audie Murphy, Gene Autry, Wallace Beery, Eddie Cantor, Roy Clarke, George M. Cohan, Walt Disney, Duke Ellington, Douglas Fairbanks, Leonardo da Vinci, Arthur Godfrey, Bob Hope, Harry Houdini, Al Jolson, Elmo Lincoln (Tarzan), Harold C. Lloyd,.jr, Tom Mix, Ronald Reagan, Will Rogers, Peter Sellers, William Shakespeare, Charles "Tom Thumb" Stratton, Paul Whiteman (King of Jazz), William Wyler (dir. of Ben Hur), Cecil B. DeMille, Sir Arthur Sullivan, John Zoffany. They are all Freemason artists and entertainers. Jack Warner, Louise B. Mayer (MGM), Darryl F. Zanuck (20th Century Fox). They are all Freemasons in the movie industry. The top dogs. Henry Ford, Samuel Gompers, Walter P. Chrysler, John Wanamaker, S.S. Kresge, J.C. Penney, John Jacob Astor, John L. Lewis, Pehr G. Gyllenhammar (Volvo), Percy Barnevik (ABB), André Citroën, Samuel Colt (Colt revolver), Edwin L. Drake (oil), Rockefeller family, Rothschild family, King C. Gillette (Razors), Charles C. Hilton (Hilton hotels), Sir Thomas Lipton (Tea), Harry S. New (Airmail), Ransom E. Olds (Oldsmobile), David Sarnoff (father of TV), John W. Teets, Dave Thomas (Wendy's Rest.), Edgar Bronfman Jr. (Seagram Whiskey), Rich DeVos (Amway), Alan Greenspan (Fed. Reserve), Giovanni Agnelli (FIAT), Peter Wallenberg (SE-Bank Sweden) They are all Freemasons in industry, trade, banking and labour. Lewis & Clarke, Charles A. Lindbergh, Kit Carson, Roald Amundsen, Admiral Richard Byrd, Commodore Robert Peary, Kit Carson, Casanova, William "Buffalo Bill" Cody, Davy Crockett, Meriwether Lewis, Robert E. Peary (Northpole). They are all Freemason adventurers. > Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Gotthold E. Lessing, Voltaire. They are all Freemason Philosophers. Buzz Aldrin, Leroy Gordon Cooper, Donn Eisele, Virgil I. Grissom, Edgar D. Mitchell, Walter Schirra Jr., Thomas P. Stafford, Paul Weitz, James Irvin, John Glenn. They are all Freemason astronauts. Mark Twain, Sir Walter Scott, Rudyard Kipling, Robert Burns, Wassily I. Maikow, Heinrich Heine, Jean P.C. de Florian, Leopoldo Lugoner, Antonio de Castro Alves, James Boswell, Alexander Pushkin, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Jonathan Swift, Oscar Wilde, Jules Verne, H.G. Wells, Robert Burns, Carlo Collodi (Pinoccio), Edward Gibbon, Francis Scott Key (US NAtional Anthem), Rudyard Kipling, Felix Salten (Bambi), Lewis Wallace (Ben Hur), Alexander Pope. They are all Freemason writers. Alexander Fleming (Penicillin), Jules Bordet, Antoine DePage, Edward Jenner, Charles & William Mayo, Karl & William Menninger, Karl A. Menninger (psychiatrist), Andrew T. Still (Osteopathy). They are all Freemasons in medicine. Carl Sagan, Hans C. Orsted, J.J Frk. von Berzelius, Alfred Edmund Brehms, Luther Burbank, Johan Ernst Gunnerus, Albert Abraham Michelson (measured speed of light), Gaspard Monge, C.F.S. Hahnemann, Pedro N. Arata, Alexandre Gustave Eiffel, Jame Smithson, John Fitch (Steamboats), Joseph Ignance Guillotin (inventor of the Guillotin), Edward Jenner (vaccin), Simon Lake (submarine), Franz Anton Mesmer (Hypnotism), Albert Einstein, A.J. Sax (saxophone). They were all Freemasons in science. Henry Baldwin, Hugo L. Black, John Blair Jr., Samuel Blatchford, Harold H. Burton, James F. Byrnes, John Catton, Thomas C. Clarke, John H. Clarke, William Cushing, Willis van Devanter, William O. Douglas, Oliver Ellsworth, Stephen J. Field, John M. Harlan, RObert H. Jackson, Joseph E. Lamar, Thurgood Marshall, Stanley Matthews, Sherman Minton, Tom Mix, William H. Moody, Samuel Nelson, William Paterson, Mahlon Pitney, Stanley F. Reed, Wiley B. Rutledge, Potter Stewart, Noah H. Swayne, Thomas Todd, Robert Trimble, Frederick M. Vinson, Earl Warren, Levi Woodbury, William B. Woods. They are all Freemasons in law. Frederic A. Bartholdi (designed the Staue of Liberty), Daniel Carter Beard (founder of Boy Scouts), Cornelius Hedges (Yellowstone Nat.Park), James Hoban (architect U.S Captial), James Naismith (basketball), Paul Revere (famous American), Rupert Murdoch (media mogul) Some more random Freemasons. Father Francisco Calvo (Jesuit Cat. Priest), Geoffrey Fisher (Canterbury), Billy Graham, Rev. Jesse Jackson, Joseph Fort Newton, Robert Shuller, Oral Roberts, Louise Farrahkan (Nation of Islam), G. Bromley Oxman (friend of Billy Graham), Joseph Smith (Mormon cult), Hyrum Smith (Brother), Brigham Young (2nd leader of Mormon cult), Sidney Rigdon (early Mormon), Heber C. Kimball, Spencer Kimball, Aleister Crowley (Satanist), Gerald B. Gardner (Wiccan), Wynn Westcott (Golden Dawn). They are all Freemason religious leaders. Jean Henry Dunant (Red Cross), Melvin Jones (Lions Int.), Giuseppe Mazzini (Ital. Illuminati leader), Albert Pike (Ku Klux Klan). They are all Freemason organization leaders. J. Edgar Hoover and William Casey are Freemasons in intelligence. Read over that list as many times as you can. Do some research and figure some shit out for your self. The vines of the Freemason brotherhood goes deep within our past present and inevitable future. No one but Freemasons know the secrets of Freemasons. They have to managed to keep the doings of there brotherhood a secret for over 3000 years. That is pretty fucking amazing. With all the media and all of the famous, honest and dishonest people in this God forsaken world and in that incredible celebrity list there is still a knowledgeable-elite group of whom all know things older than anyone. Here is where my philosophy comes into play: So we have this ancient society of astronomically advanced Sumerians and we have this ancient brotherhood of Freemasons. Freemasons have publicly leaked inconclusive and accidental evidence of 3000 years of documented history repeatedly during press conferences, wills and testimonies. Scientist have proven that Sumerians lived 5000 years ago. For all we know the 33rd and 34th degree Freemasons could have documented history up to 3500 years. It has been 3500 years since the last destruction of the Earth? Sumerians predicted a visit in 2012 from a Red Monster that comes every 3500 years to destroy the Earth. Science has hypothesized that a moon of a brown dwarf star cross-orbiting from our outer to inner solar system will collide with Earth at astronomical speeds and end all life compacting the earth into the cave ages once again. Furthermore we have a group of people that has rumored knowledge, that they do not deny, of times dating back to the last occurrence of this Nibiru's specific position in its vast galactic orbit. I think the Freemasons quite possibly hold the knowledge of the beginning of time in this era of humans ,dating 3500 years old. Through the list of so many icons of our documented history the Freemasons were there. Freemasons have controlled our society for hundreds of centuries through political advancement all the way to media production. What is it that the 33rd and 34th degree freemasons don't want us to know? WiLkShAkE

Mountain of Lies

Tuesday, February 26, 2008 Mountain of Lies Here yee!! Here Yee!! Easy to be afraid of a room with four walls. And its easy to be passive if you ain't got no fuckin' balls. To shut your mouth is to say you are weak. If you're pissed off, then let yourself peak. Let everyone know what's pissing you off. Is it the world? Your spouse? Or just simply your boss? You gotta vocalize to make yourself complete. Agree to be neat or choose not to eat meat. Come in last and be happy you lost. Take risks in life, no matter what the cost. Love, hate, respect to those who deserve. In a town, a city or on a reserve. Black, white or brown, with a smile or a frown. On the couch in your undies. Or, in your wedding gown. We are all the same in this life living game. Followed by guilt, there is an ocean of shame. There is a mountain of lies that must be exposed. There have been way to many doors left locked and closed. That huge mountain of lies was once a little hill. Before that who knows? Maybe it was a field. A world without lies means... There is no need for a shield or guns. Or people getting covered in mud, who die face down in the mud. Racism is war and ignorance is a fucking disease. We're killing the world and mother nature is on her knees. She is begging us please to see what she sees and cure the disease, caused by you and me. We gotta end world hunger by opening free trade To the ones who get nothing to the ones that get paid. And be open from one culture to the next. All we can do is try our best, to clean up the mess that we left. We live a short time and in that time we pollute. I bet before man came to this world it was cute. No cement, no glass, no cuts, no casts. No bullets, no bombs, no nuclear blasts. No fertilizer, no two world wars past. No lawyers. No Law. No Sunday night mass. No racists, no pedophiles no raped up the ass. No fear no blood, but also no humans with a past. Good people learn from the mistakes they have made. The good live life not to get paid, laid or made. The good people live to be equal. No better. No worse. Just equal. It real easy to be scared of a room with four walls, when you are living your life, like you fucking know it all. You are no good for nothing if you discriminate. If you kill for fun well your life is a living debate. If you are a right wing confederate, with no desire for change....... I hope one of your snipers has you locked in their range. That's not the solution. There really is none. We are here to destroy where our families are from. Where our babies will grow to be woman and men. They will depend on the next generation. WiLkShAkE

The Bum Who got Struck

Tuesday, February 19, 2008 The Bum Who got Struck I used to manage this bar/resto in Montreal called Le Pistol. It was a rad slot in a downtown stretch of appealing sud-holes and floor-stomps. The front wall of this bar/resto was a sliding glass window. So as you already have imagined, the summer times were spent getting loaded on Black Label quarts and Jameson while the ongoing social traffic peered perfectly focused into the crowded smoke-cave of drunk. The thing is that i had a slew of regulars on steamy summer days that ached for wobbly pops early in the afternoon, right after work. So usually by 5:30 we were half in the bag. There I am, heavy gulping Guiness and i see a familiar face. Its the homeless dude that I once saw zombie-struck with both arms tied and needles still piercing bruised skin on both arms, just walking around the neighborhood. He was moaning, but seemingly in good spirits considering the H army marching his central nervous system. He was now in the middle of the road, screaming at some slick-prepped money-manican driving a fanschy smanschy soft-top ass-wagon for not giving him any change. The light turns green. Swerve. Now this homeless dude is pissed off. The money-maggot, with two titties next to him that are worth more than my house... each, starts speeding away and stops in front of the homeless. The H Army grabs the guys windshield wiper and tears the fucking thing right off! So as you can imagine, this Slickster hops out of his car and beats living shit out of this homeless man. The poor guy must of taken 9 or 10 shots to the bargain bin before he was too beat to beat. So, for some imagery, I'm drunk, so are two of my buddies, we are hanging out of a window bar on one of the busiest corners in Montreal, at 5:30 in the afternoon watching a homeless man wearing rags with no weight bleeding to death on the ground with some popularity engine walking around like he owns the world and a thousand people gathering to watch the show. I didn't see a policeman for 30 minutes. The dick with a nice set a brakes tried to get into his car and some good honest civilians, who were not drunk, restrained the guy until the cops got there. The cop cuffed the bum and set free the fucker. I shook my head and chugged the rest of my beer. WiLkShAkE

19 Beers Deep

Sunday, December 30, 2007 19 Beers Deep I drink ...a lot. I am a big chunk of Irish but i believe that has nothing to do with the amount of booze i comfortably absorb. The other night i was at the local bar in my small town and i had an epiphany while throat sliding a 2 ouncer of canadian whiskey. As I tipped back the dirty sauce into my pizza hole, i glanced at my old time friend, who suffers from Chromes disease and realized that i am just like the scratchy part of velcro, and, Elmira, my home town, is the softer half that allows me to penetrate, and attach to it. I mean, i was drunk. I am not referring to a keg party in college drunk. I mean, stains on my shirt, sleeping in my boots, kissing 12 girls who hate me drunk. As the band went on, the cutest girl in the world sat beside me and i spilt a whole beer on her. Not just a couple swigs, but the entire full beer. I guess while she was asking me to stop pouring beer on her, i was side-tracked and stream-poured my whole beer on her. I don't feel bad though, because she must of been pretty drunk too to accept a pinte shower:) Like Molasses, i hurdled through the sea of inebriation towards the edge of the bar. I actually got arrested while drinking in this bar when i was 17 so, needless to say, me and the bartender/owner have a special bond and respect. I asked for a beer, and he gave me 3 shots of whiskey. I stressed to the bartender, "No Mans, I's friggin' wasted." He had none of it. As he glittered in school boy glee, i gagged back the three 2 ouncers and stumbled outside for a dart. It was cold, but, luckily, i couldn't feel my skin. My cortex was like a lethal sponge of intoxicity. I grabbed my smoke, fired that shit up and instantly i got a flirtatious touch rub on my shoulder. "Hey you, wanna come back to my place and fuck me in my hot tub?" I turned to view a slightly-haggard, 40-year old woman who was probably 55 with my beer-goggles. I replied as sincerely as i could. "You're to old to have a hot tub." I walked about three steps to the left of her, turned my back and pondered what my statement meant. Luckily, i forgot about it quickly. The thing is, where i grew up and am still growing, 19 beers deep is totally acceptable and that is what i love about it. In Elmira, no one judges your temporary retardations.

Racism Today

Thursday, November 15, 2007 RACISM TODAY We are still scarred by a vicious past of social elite and common disrespect given to each race by each race to this very day. Where I live.....there are the most mind blowingly dumb people that are racist as all fucking hell. However, raising my point....the racist people i know and in some cases love to hate, are all below a standard line of reasonable intellingence. Does this mean that racism=stupidity? The answer is no. Here is why i believe this answer to be correct. Racism bores holes in peoples minds and builds nests inside there brains. Like little skull-driving wood peckers, racism drills fiercl into the brain, but settles in comfortably and unnoticed, like a wood pecker nest inside a tree. Before any type of coherent intelligence, the racism pecker is there. It pecks at your brain non-stop and takes control sometimes. Smart or stupid, it is no ones fault initially. It is fault of the facist asshole who invented the wood pecker. I fucking hate racist pecking wood peckers. We are what we are taught to be until we can teach ourselves to be what we want. I still remember the first racist thing i ever heard. It was from a drunk uncle of mine and I wish to never repeat it. I thank him for being so arrogant because it propelled me into severely detesting every form of racism the little wood pecker reveals itself in. The wood pecker is swift and takes many forms as to not reveal its pure form. RACISM'S TRUE FORM- Pure Hate, violence, discrimination, public ridicule RACISMS COMEDIC FORM- Jokes, laughing at the jokes, accepting the jokes, not thinking the people who tell the jokes are socialist bastards. DON'T TELL RACIST JOKES......IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID, AND OF A FAR INFERIOR RACE i am racist against racists...."Can i get a HELL YEAH?" RACISM IS THOUGHT TO BE OK THESE DAYS AND IT MAKES ME SICK

Weird, Scary and Funny Things I Remember

Thursday, November 08, 2007 WEIRD, SCARY AND FUNNY THINGS REMEMBER I remember when i was six and there was a kid who always shit his pants. He didn't seem embarrassed about it all. In fact, I once saw him with a bag of shit next to his desk. I swear to the universe there once sat a sandwich sized ziploc full of feces next to this kids desk in grade 2. I never knew why. Did he go in class? Did his mom say to him..."Here my beloved child, instead of pooping your pants in class, just undo your pants and do it in this bag! It is your wittle poopy bag:)" I remember this kid i knew in grades 3-12. The poor young chap suffered critically from cerebral palsy. His social skills were obscure, but average from a kid who was made fun of a lot for all the wrong reasons. He was actually really funny and i am sure he still warrants a wholesome howl from time to time. I still can't remember if i participated in these events i am about to tell you, but here goes. Have you heard of a gas pedal? Not the type that accelerates a cars transmission. A gas pedal is where you hold someones legs up in the air and spread them apart and put all of your pressure, with your foot, on the victims crotch. The thing is that this kid use to beg for gas pedals. He really enjoyed them. I remember when my best friend, my neighbor and I were in my neighbors shed showing each other our genitals at the ages of 4, 4 and 3. My best friend and I ripped out our tiny penises, which were at that time only meant for liquid waste removal as my neighbor, female, showed her backside to us and revealed an underwear load of misplaced poopy. Our first burn from a woman i am sure for us both. The thing is that her dad walked in the shed as all three of us were genital-wise in the buff. Oh what he must think. I remember the first time i noticed street lights going off or on as I passed beneath them. It still happens at least 10 times per week. I remember smoking joints with my buddies in high school as we sat in our cars listening to slang-german, mennonnite accented schtanky's play baseball. I remember the first time my older brother scared me by saying that Jason lived in the forest that we were passing through. I remember when me and my bud were downhill thrash skate boarding in montreal down the plateau hill all day and i lost balance going 50 km/hour, wiped, broke my shoulder and tore just about everything in my left knee. As i smashed the cement i started to roll and came halt at the base of a parked car. I heard babies crying in accordance with shredding pain. As my skate-thrashed body came to reality i noticed 2 little girls crying and an old man staring in awe that i was standing. I humbled down the street and muttered the words "Its ok, but always wear a helmet" I walked for 48 light years it seemed before my corpse crashed and i almost fainted. My buddy ran up the hill to help me and rolled a joint for me while i was dying in the tub. It is so fun to reflect on old times. Write me back if you want to tell me a crazy story. Cheers!

Trucker Ted

Tuesday, October 30, 2007 TRUCKER TED i know this overweight american his name is trucker ted he goes to church has lots of pride wishes all the fags were dead he gets pissed and beats his wife tries hard not to sin he's old fashioned doesn't believe in having a recycling bin one day he was hunting and he shot a pregnant moose he shot it in the belly and hung it on a noose on a cross in his yard for all the kids to see nailed a sign in the ground that said be like me praise the lord for making war and raising prices at the store thanks to christ for the heist giving people something to live for he caught a fish on a barb ripped it out threw it back cast that barb out again and ate cold pizza for a snack he starts fires he loves barbed wire likes to cage his birds cramming his sentences into one word in three simple words he's fat lazy and dumb but to he's number one well i guess a distant second to his favorite hunting vest he's got a tattoo of a confederate flag that sits proudly on his arm and across the other he's got another that says : "do the world no harm" he's a walking contradiction all his life he's spent giving away his prize possessions yearly when its lent he'll keep going on praising and loving god he's naive to the fact that he's a fucking fraud and also to the fact he stereotypes us all and hopefully not for us will we have to take the fall for all people like him who break the world into two halves the ones who try and control and the ones who try and laugh

The Waste Anthem

Monday, October 29, 2007 THE WASTE ANTHEM we're wasting time on this planet and soon you'll see we're not so god damn independent we're not alone on this planet the aliens roam the towns and they will wait for the perfect time before they strike so if you think that you've planned it get ready to destroy the world cause you will if you don 't think twice before you strike think twice before you strike nobody gets hurt think twice before you strike the city is burnt holly she looks like a man never had trouble with making friends but she rips her hair out at night and she tells me about her drea ms the blinding neon green beams of light and the treacherous trip so she got down on her knees and begged for me not to leave so i told her what i could they do not want your brain think twice before you strike nobody gets hurt think twice before you strike the city is burnt she screams out why she was crying the earth is slowly dying green peace my ass nothing else will work she has ten recycling bins tries hard not to commit any sins in fear some big guy in the sky will send her to hell true the future has been seen so by her tale inside her time machine but i try not to question shit think twice before you strike nobody gets hurt think twice before you strike the city is burnt

S.M.P

Sunday, October 28, 2007 SMP (SEX MONEY POWER) Sex Money and Power is a phrase that is riddled with catch 22's and generic hearsay. The phrase is the essence of humanity to this date. I have often pondered a parallel, yet opposite reality where humans are set to cure and not to win. Maybe there phrase would be "Aid, Equality and Accept" as apposed to Sex Money and Power. The shown parallelism is about as simple as it gets. SEX Hey we are humans!! We will always get boners and wetness no matter what we do. Hell, i love sex, those who don't are usually weird or religiously impaired. So, it is known that our natural state drives us to overpopulate our world into a waste filled-bio hazard. Everyone knows this on some level. We say to the youth not to litter in a pathetic attempt to potentially reward us in our decaying years. Here is the irony. We depend on educating our youth to help save the future, however, it is the youth that is the next inevitable culprits of world demolition. Well, our rights are fucked with everyday, and we don't do shit about it. Why not propose some sort of mandatory tube-tie or snip-snip at the age where it is most hormonally appropriate of a certain percentage of one cohort? Of course you are realizing now, after briefly considering it, that this idea is rediculous and impossible to make happen without severe backlash rebellion. Point being.....stop having so many fucking kids. Procreation is another inevitable necessity of humans at a volatile percentage. So....we are screwed. HAHAHA...i don't know why i am laughing. MONEY I am not a communist. I am not a capitalist. I am somewhere in the foggy haze of greedy that causes guilt. I can't help wanting money. We have been forced to need a certain amount to live comfortably in this capitalist, nationalistic regime that we somehow survive within. Bla Bla Bla...money causes war and racism and all of the worlds problems. The currency will be the chartered weapon the crucifies humanity. So i ask the rich....you know....the ones who have more money to live with 30 times over....please, rich assholes, pretty please, you fascist hypocrites, i am begging, fucking racist nationalists with more money the blood cells to give some away. I mean still have a mansion and 15 cars, but spare a collective few billion to help the third world. Hell, if someone starts a rich person salary cap, in which the rich were still rich but post-capped income was transferred to various funds, i would work harder then hell to have my salary capped and work twice as hard to earn the highest post-cap salary possible to help people out. What the hell, i would still be rich. POWER Power is another inevitable trait, dissolved in our blood, tattooed in our brain, crazy-glued in our instinctive actions. We have to win all the time. We fight for power. We kill for power. We judge personality by amount of power. So? Money equals power? What about sex? What does sex equal? Does sex equal peace? Peace is the one thing we all need to survive and so is sex. HERE IS WHAT I THINK WE SHOULD DO......... TRANSFER ALL THE MONEY AND POWER INTO ELIMINATING ALL DISEASES, STD'S OR NOT, SO WE CAN JUST BE AT PEACE AND BANG ALL THE TIME.

Support your Local Food Drive

Thursday, October 18, 2007 Support your local food drive I am fucking pissed. Today i woke up. Everything after that was mayhem and inappropriately absorbed. My dog shit on the carpet....twice. I ran out of milk, i got a skid mark, i worked 12 hours, i forgot to brush my teeth, i bought girls socks by mistake, I cut myself shaving, i ran out of shampoo, my vacuum broke, i got a flat tire, i ran out of weed, i got the runs, i broke a guitar string, i accidentally deleted my i pod, i cut myself at work, i burnt myself at work, work sucked, i stepped on a piece of glass and it went through my toenail, my button broke on my pants, i spilt my coffee, i undercooked a steak and i just realized that i am the luckiest person in the world. Well...high in the ranking by comparison.

Picking up dog shit and freedom of dogs

Thursday, October 18, 2007 Picking up dog shit and freedom of dogs As you might of read in the previous blog "The Montreal Puppy Mill Disaster", you might have known that i have two dogs. Labs and shit. I live in a ground level apartment that is tremendously encouraging of the "Stoop and Scoop". Stoop and scoop? They are so polite and kind that they would not dare offend someone with the word poop. Shit, turd...poop....bloody diharrea corn. I am quite the opposite. A few weeks ago I was walking my respected and well-trained dogs around the parameter of my apartment complex. Around the back corner of the apartment complex there are some trees clustered about 40 or 50 feet out from the nearest back door. I had stopped at the store, had a bag of groceries, a bag of previously dropped shit and my youngest daughter decides to let one rip. I always pick up my dogs turds, unless it is in a reasonable place where a baby won't end up eating it before it decomposes. Now...at this point my youngest, Ruca, wasn't house trained so her shitting outside felt as good as a shiatsu message. So of course as she finished up she gave her fresh turd a sniff and came to greet my happy expressions. I gave her a treat, said "good girl" and didn't pick up the shit because of its location, at the base of a long branched pine 40-50 feet off the property. As i was walking away from the tree, freshly soiled with natural fertilizer, proud and content, smiling, brimmed with glee, i heard a haggard old mans voice from the nearest apartment now 10 feet away. "ARE YOU GONNA PICK THAT UP?" The man said in haste. I replied..."No."...He replied "You better pick up that shit off my lawn." I replied..."No way...it is out of the way where no one will walk, and it is not your lawn, its not even the complexes lawn." He replied..."That's it I am calling the landlord" I replied..."Take it easy you old bag, I will pick up the fucking shit." Now vice-versa, me with haste, I unwillingly...tied the dogs up, set down my groceries and walked back to the tree. This old fucker watched me until i left. I fucking hate that guy. He probably hasn't had sex with his wife for 60 years and wishes he was dead. Well, i guess it still got back to the landlord. The next day i got a phone call from my landlord saying that "A tenant watched you leave feces on the property." I kind of lost it, and ratted out the old man, and said how i was going to leave it but didn't and where the shit was, under the tree, off the property. It kind of shut her up and she proceeded...... "Another tenant said they saw you with your dogs off a leash peeing outside of your back door" I replied..."Ya, ok...? Did they like it?" She replied..."Well Mr. Wilkshake, they most certainly did not, and we didn't appreciate it either. I replied..."Where else are my dogs gonna pee?" She replied..."Your dogs cannot be off a leash on our property or else we will have to call the humane society enforcement." I replied..."OK" My dogs are labs. They are smarter than me!! They don't run away...they never have. So i used to let them out side my door for a quick in-and-out pee, what's the big deal? fucking fascists...hahaha!

The Quebec Puppy Mill Disaster

Tuesday, October 16, 2007 The Quebec Puppy Mill Disaster I lived in the glorious city of montreal for near 3 short years. Montreal has the presence of a town of 10 000 with style of 2089. I once saw a couple of dames with shoulder sleeves walking down the street looking sexy. They strutted, full of tattoos in tight jeans and tank tops, slim and attractive with a presence that shook the visible radius around them. As the two approached i began to realize something crucial about the ladies upon which i was pleasantly gazing. 50...maybe 55 years old they both were, as confident as young foxes making their first kill. Little did i know that a city of such low key energy and pure beauty could be host to one of the most outrageous animal cruelty crimes documented in history. The Quebec Puppy Mill Disaster The dogs were living and breeding in a bungalow in Blainville, just north of Montreal. Just a regular house with no license for breeding with an obscene amount of poor pooches suffering from neglect. The SPCA said they knew of the breeder and even gave out some recommendations during inspections from 2000 to 2002. But they said there were only 15 dogs in the house at that time. A notable SPCA official noted that there were about 100 dogs running or crawling in urine and excrement when officials made the rescue. "There were dead corpses walking. Dogs feeding on dogs, live," This official said. The SPCA said this type of abuse is common across Quebec, where regulations are less strict for abusive breeders than in other provinces and countries and states. Breeders don't even need a license to operate. The breeder is facing criminal charges of animal cruelty but even if he's convicted there is nothing to stop him from getting back into the business again. Why has nothing been done about this? How can people live with themselves? Should this not be a murder trial? I would say give the motherfucker 50 years in maximum security!! He is obviously insane...and a murderer of all ages of life!! I am the proud owner of a 4 year old black lab/boarder collie and a five month year old yellow lab. I have a cat that lives outdoors but for some reason, over the past 5 years, he has always made it back to my belly when i am sleeping for a good snooze...every night. Last year i had to give my pit bull, beloved and talented Zeus, to a home with a fenced-in back yard so he could live a more enjoyable life banished from society in ontario and other provinces. One owner...one dog, and the assholes abusing multiple dogs at a time in Quebec can be convicted and back in business within a year. I almost vomited as I wrote that sentence. Authorities in Quebec hope to get the breeder to relinquish ownership of the dogs so they can be adopted quickly, instead of having to wait for a drawn out court decision. So now...a convicted animal abuser, has the right to reserve the ownership of the dogs he mistreats. C'mon humans....give your heads a shake. In an inter-galactic sense...are we much different than any animal or life form or fucking existence on this planet?

Metaphoric Diharrea

Saturday, October 13, 2007 metaphoric diharrea She was as sweet as the hot caramel that burnt the fuck out of my lips in chef school after it cooled down. I mean this girl was a ten maybe even an 11. She was as punk rock as a penguin. She wore black framed glasses on her glowing sight rocks that spewed beauty into the oncoming visions displayed to her smart box. I once asked this sharp gal why her fire was hate and love was water. She wept ill-nature and corroded-postured. Redemption was sought and her world was the sun. The food was like mud that turned bright gold. In time we all would learn to ask the fever question that exploded after implosion. We drifted as unpackers, packed up and then in. Sideways became irrelevant and focus consumed like rum soaked pirates. Adults are adolescentl-inspired. :) Relocation brings content like pooping. Home is where the heart is. Glad to have ya back!! Saturday, October 06, 2007

Mable

January 21st 2006 mable a wrinkled old fable about realistic mable... she's unable not stable for wrinkled old fables The clock struck nine not a second past the dot... old mable just pulled in to her work parking lot she's all hot and pissed she gonna be late got screwed last night on the first fucking date popped a couple pills... hit the rave box no locks, its stocked with people stoned into shock spock ears pointed she locked on a jock next thing she knew she's dry humping his cock tick tock..the clock strikes two oh shit what the fuck is mable gonna do? got screwed needs food the drugs counteract.. her pack was black but now its missing from the rack her contract was packed now theres is a dude thats stacked he's foamin at the mouth and he's craving a snack tick tock the clock strikes four mable lying on her back and screaming for more i bet her junk was all wet then the jock went soft... you could've smelt the disappoint from across the whole loft mable is lying on her back and she is going to sleep she is annoyed by the sound of her grinding teeth she can't sleep, been partying for a week she's gotta deek she quietly steps into her sneaks opens the door it gives a loud creak she walking home feeling like a fucking freak tick tock the clock strikes eight mable is lying in her bed and her buzz is pro-rate steps in the shower she looks in the mirror a tear comes near she cracks open a beer pounds the can back its the essence of life this poor girl was once somebody's wife now she is staring at her work from her parking space she laughs to herself..... "I fucking love this place"

A Man-Hating Lesbian I Once Regrettably Knew

Tuesday, October 02, 2007 A man-hating lesbian i once regrettably knew Professional Cooking is, in an essence, my only means of government acknowledged income. I went to chef school and worked in fine dining atmospheres my entire working life. Now...the cold-heart honest truth is this: I have found every chef i ever worked for to be a loose cannon. The job is stressful. Most of the times that i fucked up, i was yelled at totally inappropriately and then quickly received a heartfelt apology. I got use to this, which was necessary to excel in my field of work. William Cox- My Chef from 1996-2001 Good old bill was an un-shaved-overweight-angry-quick-witted-spazzy-ill-tempered, phenomenal chef who taught me everything i know about cooking today. I vividly recall 10 years previous to now when i was 15 years old and in grade 10, presenting a salad into the pass. It was a baby spinach/goat cheese/walnut/caramalized apple salad draped and NOT TOSSED in a wild blueberry/balsamic reduction vinaigrette. The problem good ol' Bill had with the salad i presented was that i had tossed instead of draped. "W-W-W-W-What the F-F-FUCK is Th-Th-That?" Bill studdered fiercly when over-emotional. Bill grabbed the plate, cursing me in every language he spoke, and frisbee-pitched it into the dish pit showering spinach, broken glass and a circus of edible debrie atop the dishwashers heads. I muffled the phrase as "In-your-face" as i could....."What the fuck?" Bill lost his cool. I knew he knew that i knew he lost it. So..that was good enough. Time went by, 4 more years past and our peculiar apprentice-chef relationship thickened through historical drama. I respected the fact that good ol' Bill put forth a shard of physical sorrow that somewhat metaphorically pronounced an apology. I have always respected peoples thoughts and actions no matter what the present presents. However, my latest chef curved my views on how inconsiderate and hypocritical a human being can really be. Chef Laurie- my "chef" for 4 measly months I finally did it, I landed a great job on a fancy line, in a prestige restaurant/hotel. My pay was great, my co-workers were new and critical but i respected them all until this one girls' true colors came through. Her name was Chrissy and she was another chef on my new line. I quickly realized that this girl had worked for 3 years in a family restaurant previous to the line we were on and that was all the restaurant/cooking experience she listed on her resume which landed her the job that i was just hired for. To put it in perspective, i barely got the job and endured 3 mind-bending interviews before it seemed like they settled for me and i had 8 years of fine dining experience along with college education in fine dining. Through hearsay and gossip, i learned that my chef, Laurie, kind of had the hots for this chef on line with no chef experience. It was said that she was hired for her giant breasts when her resume wasn't the best. Day in day out, Chrissy struggled to make herself look as qualified as the rest of us. Not only was she much inexperienced by comparison, but she also was naieve to the fact that she had much to learn. She warranted no respect from the other employees in the hotel. We all tried to help but nothing sunk in. I finally approached Laurie on the matter of Chrissy's incompetence. As delicately and as professionally as possible, i tried to share an equal, non-biased point of view on what it meant to be a chef on this line. I described Chrissy's lack of creativity, unlearned knowledge and dependence on the other chefs including myself to complete the simplest of tasks. "Are you sexist?" Chef Laurie insinuatingly replied with no hesitance as if she was waiting to say it the entire time i was presenting my dilemma. "No...why would you say that?" I replied "Well, it seems like you resent Chrissy because she is female." Laurie added all fire and brimstone. I left the office calm and reached the line furious. The next 4 weeks, my days off were split up, and it seemed that every shift i worked was with Chrissy. Once again, i approached my chef. This time on the matter of my schedule. "Well, i would like my days of in a row like the rest of the cooks...It only seems fair." A slight grimace formed on Laurie's face at my comment." "OK...I will try my best." She ended the meeting. I left the office happy and reached the line liberated. The next three weeks were as i wished with my 2 days off per week side by side. Life was great!! I received an invitation in the mail for my best friends brothers' bachelor party. The party wasn't for 5 weeks which gave me ample time to book it off work. I hadn't booked of more than on day in a row the entirety of my employment on this fancy line. For the bachelor party I would need two. The next day, once again, i approached chef to book the time off and was informed by the sous chef Chris that Chef Laurie had taken a holiday of three weeks. I was also informed that i could book the time off through Chris. It was a tough time in the month to get off because other people had vacations planned but Chris realized the importance of the bachelor party and clearly stated "No matter what...you will get these days off." I returned the wedding invitation and e-mailed my buddy who was to wed, joyfully saying that i would be at the bachelor party and the wedding. It was gonna be great. Chef returned from her three week vacation to her cottage with her wife. She rushed onto the line with my vacation time sheet i hand and called me into her office. "No that absolutely can't happen...There is no way you can have these days off." She opened the conversation in reply to my two days booked off fresh off her 21. She had stole the bachelor party from me so i quit on spot, right then and there in the office. She calmed me down with a two dollar/hour raise offer after i threw a hissy fit. She praised me for my work, and so disgustingly agreed with everything i said. She wasn't even listening. I left the office enraged and depressed. Later on that week, i realized i had to call and cancel my invite to the party. Everyone was disappointed that i was not going to be there. I also took a look at the schedule for the next week which was the bachelor party and quickly realized that chef was planning a getaway again that week and had granted Chrissy 5 days off after she had denied 2 days from me. I also realized that Chrissy booked the time off after i did, in fact two weeks after i did. i also realized that all that was needed for me to go to the party was for Laurie to work an extra 3 hours on one of the days i requested off. It was Lauries ignorance, sexism and all around hate the denied me from being at the most memorable party of one of my best friends' life. I now hated every second, off every minute off every hour of every shift that i was in that godforsaken hotel. I put my two weeks notice in when chef was on her fourth week of vacation. Laurie came back from her fourth week of vacation in 6 weeks and realized i only had 4 days of work until i was no longer an employee there. My last three days were the start of the new weeks schedule. I was scheduled for a ten hour shift, solo with Chrissy. The thing is that, Chrissy always had those days off. I always worked with the other chefs on those days and they were also baffled at how there days off were changed. The next two shifts i was scheduled for, which were my last two days, 11-hour banquet shifts, which i never worked because i was on the fine-dining line exclusively. I gave chef a call at home: "You are the worst chef i have ever worked for. You are what is wrong with the world. You are a sexist, self-righteous, hypocritical man-hater." Before she could respond..i hung up. Ten minutes later, she rolled in and told me to go home. I left the line liberated, amused and brimmed with content. SEXUAL PREFERENCE ASIDE, WE ARE ALL HUMAN. HUMANS CAN BE ASSHOLES. THERE ARE TWO TYPES OF ASSHOLES IN THE WORLD. THERE ARE THE ASSHOLES WHO YELL AND SCREAM BUT QUICKLY FORGIVE AND FORGET AND THERE ARE THE ASSHOLES WHO MALICIOUSLY TRY AND CONTROL PEOPLES LIVES AND EMOTIONS. CHEF...YOU ARE THE WORST ASSHOLE I HAVE EVER MET.

What Punk Rock Has Been Reduced To

Tuesday, September 25, 2007 What Punk Rock Has Been Reduced To I am sick and tired of degenerates that i turn up in searches that call themselves punk rock. Don't get me wrong, i am not saying that i am the punkiest punker that holds the greatest punknocscity but i am fed up with fakes that can't admit how stupid they are. Once again i am not saying that i am the smartest guy in the world...in fact...i am considerably dumb in the grand scheme of things. This is what chaps my ass: 1. Punk is no longer a way of life but a plagued fashion of comeovers and tight pants. 2. Emo kids say they are punk as fuck. 3. Emo is the next generation? 1. Punk is no longer a way of life but a plagued fashion of come-overs and tight pants. I have been going to warped tours sine i was 13 when i saw great punk rock bands like Bad Religion, Swingin Utters, Mighty Mighty Bosstone, NOFX, All, Pennywise, Strung Out , No Use for a Name, Sick Of It All, The Bouncing Souls, Man Will Surrender, Hepcat, Ozomatli, Descendents, Lagwagon, Red Five, Mad Caddies, Tilt, El Centro Furious IV, No Knife, and the list goes on and on and on................ The best part about these warped tours is that the crowd was harmoniously infested with preps, sharpies, hard cores, hippies, rad boys, skanks and punk rockers. The mix of culture and taste is what gave warped tour its unique, pronoun-filled, deliberate blend of unplanned style. The style simply was. Nowadays, when at the warped, i generally stick with my bro's at the union stage and try to catch a worthy sound lane of the main stages when my favorite bands are on. It sure beats scraping my way through the generic sea of tight-panted cry babies that consumes the depleted numbers of FANS in the warped crowd. I am not saying that i am prejudice against the stereotypical emo style. Hell, i like playing games with my bro's to guess if its is a male or a female ass that we are drooling over glued motionless to the inside an 80 dollar pair of pants. What i am saying is that now the kids compare themselves by the intensity of there style and punk rock is being devoured by these emotional leetch-like rollercoasting basketcases we call emo's. Punk rock never was about style...it was about not giving a shit and not giving in to all the fashions presented by the manipulated world. Now all we are left with is oceans of drones who all look the same and are starved for affection. They fill there souls with the looks of other manican and strive to look better than they feel. It chaps my fucking ass. 2. Emo kids say they are punk as fuck. One time i was in montreal at a place called The Metropolis. Nofx was playing and to my surprise...they rolled into the Decline. Needless to say...i spilled a bit of becks filled diharrea into my drawers. The crowd drew silent as Fat Mike said calmly "Just sit back and shut up for next 20 minutes." The crowd entered an uncontrollable frenzy of shit-kicking and screaming. I turned to the bar to get a fresh drink for, i quote myself...."The most intense piece of punk rock production ever recorded". As i turned to the bar, a 17 or 18 year old kid smashed into my back and caused me to spill my beer all over my buddy...i turned around and to my surprise stood a cocaine-filled chunk of adrenalin with his hair pasted over his face, yet perfectly intact, wearing a white t-shirt that said in bold writing, "Save Punk Rock". I was pissed to shit that i spilled my beer and looked at him like i was going to shit in his mouth. The little fucker had the balls to say "Get out of my way ya old fuck." I was too excited that the Decline was being played live to manhandle him, so, i tuned back into getting a fresh beer and kept an eye on him just to see what he would do next. Of course, this little emo kid, sporting a "Save Punk Rock" shirt dove into the crowd fists first and started kicking and screaming solely focused on moshing as apposed to the music. Saving punk rock is about showing up to the shows for the music, not violence. In fact, the whole thing was one big controversy. I am sick and tired of self-righteous, hypocritical people-haters like that dumb fuck that spilt my beer. I hate that kid for being a hypocrite and spilling my beer, not for being an emo kid. C'mon emo's...get your shit together. 3. Emo is the next generation? That chaps my ass. That sub-title scares the bajesus right out of me. To think that a sea of people that titles themselves "Emotional" is the next generation is dis-heartening at best. So concerned with your own feelings. How bout the feelings of others? Self-righteous?

MTV

Sunday, July 08, 2007 MTV Major record labels destroy what is real about music. Production agents come in with the jingles, put a face to some words and exploit human nature at its worst to a sea of blood-thirsty drones. The drones absorb this information and live by the story they are exposed to. Little do they know that the stories being shown are always far from the whole truth. How many bands on MTV do you think lived in a van for a month, touring the nation on a self-booked tour? Rock means living the life. I can honestly say that the top five bands i have seen live were at dingy holes in the ground on self-aligned tours. 1. FLASHLIGHT-Call the Office 2. PLANET SMASHERS-Cafe Campus Bottom 3. CHRIS MURRAY-Cafe Campus Bottom 4. MUSTARD PLUG-Trasheteria 5. THE LUDES- Central Tavern I respect these great bands because they are part of hard working touring labels that strive solely to keep good music realistic and free from unwanted residue left behind from the leach-like corporate blood suckers that we call MTV.

Punk Rock to Me

Sunday, July 08, 2007 Punk Rock to me Trends of humans have been operationally manipulated. Lifeforms much like ourselves capitalize on uniformity of culture and political views. Progressively through time, titanical operational methods of mass marketing, have reached a new high in there manipulated class form, the stereotype of "Normal". These "Normal" people don't express themselves in any way to do good, bad or anything at all. They go with the flow/with the grain and do no good in the world with there meaningless lives. A dedicated, true punk rocker knows it is not about changing the world. It is about fighting for your own battles to get through the world you are dissolved in. To be a punk rocker you are not a victim of conformity, you will not give in to anybody. You got something to say, well bloody well say it cause if you don't you will be swallowed by the title wave named "hypocrisy" which carries the "Go with the flows" and the "With the grains" smoothly and comfortably above the oil-track ridden earth that has been un- righteously exposed, iceberg water enclosed but not oil owner nationalist owned.